Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Random Thoughts on Hump Day

Every time someone says hump day at work I snicker.

In times of extreme desperation, a post-it can double as a Kleenex.

I hate it when people say, "is it hot enough out there for you?" when you walk inside all haggard and melting from a 115 degree heat index. Just once I want it to be someone I can actually respond to with my true answer: "Why no! It isn't too hot! I truly enjoy crawling inside the devil's asshole and lounging around ... Fucker."

Word to the wise: Make sure you don't have to pee before you start your spray tan session.

Another word to the wise: Spray tan booths do not have very functional drains. 

There has been some debate, but i maintain that you are a wimp if you get a girl's number and text to ask her out rather than calling.

The phrase, "I wouldn't do that for a million dollars" makes absolutely no sense to me. There really isn't a whole hell of a lot I wouldn't do for a million dollars.

Why do some people you've met briefly months ago insist on pointing out that you can't remember their names? Sometimes I just tell them, "Oh man! you're right. You just weren't that memorable."

I really hate it when I step into the shower and then realize I have to poop.

Ciao,
Shannanigans

No comments:

Post a Comment